Monday 12 August 2013

8 WAYS TO DEAL WITH FRUSTRATION




FRUSTRATION
Psychologically people suffer from frustration and this affects the way of our living putting us at the edge of committing murder by taking ones life. Frustration is a common emotional response to opposition, relating to anger and disappointment, it arises from the perceived resistance to the fulfillment of individual will. The greater the obstruction, and the greater the will, the more the frustration is likely to be.

Below are causes and symptoms of frustartion;

Causes of frustration may be internal or external. In people, internal frustration may arise from challenges in fulfilling personal goals and desires, instinctual drives and needs, or dealing with perceived deficiencies, such as a lack of confidence or fear of social situations. Conflict can also be an internal source of frustration; when one has competing goals that interfere with one another, it can create cognitive dissonance. External causes of frustration involve conditions outside an individual, such as a blocked road or a difficult task. While coping with frustration, some individuals may engage in passive–aggressive behavior, making it difficult to identify the original cause(s) of their frustration, as the responses are indirect. A more direct, and common response, is a propensity towards aggression.

Under Causes:
To the individual experiencing anger, the emotion is usually attributed to external factors that are beyond his or her control. Although mild frustration due to internal factors (e.g. laziness, lack of effort) is often a positive force (inspiring motivation), it is more often than not a perceived uncontrolled problem that instigates more severe, and perhaps pathological. An individual suffering from pathological anger will often feel powerless to change the situation they are in, leading to and, if left uncontrolled, further anger.

Also, it can be a result of blocking motivated behavior where an individual may react in several different ways. He/she may respond with rational problem-solving methods to overcome the barrier. Failing in this, he/she may become frustrated and behave irrationally.

An example of blockage of motivational energy would be the case of a worker who wants time off to go fishing but is denied permission by his/her supervisor. Another example would be the executive who wants a promotion but finds he/she lacks certain qualifications. If, in these cases, an appeal to reason does not succeed in reducing the barrier or in developing some reasonable alternative approach, the frustrated individual may resort to less adaptive methods of trying to reach the goal. He/she may, for example, attack the barrier physically, verbally, or both.

Under Symptoms:

Frustration can be considered a problem–response behavior, and can have a number of effects, depending on the mental health of the individual. In positive cases, this frustration will build until a level that is too great for the individual to contend with, and thus produce action directed at solving the inherent problem. In negative cases, however, the individual may perceive the source of frustration to be outside of their control, and thus the frustration will continue to build, leading eventually to further problematic behavior (e.g. violent reaction).

Stubborn refusal to respond to new conditions affecting the goal, such as removal or modification of the barrier, sometimes occurs. As pointed out by J.A.C. Brown, severe punishment may cause individuals to continue nonadaptive behavior blindly: "Either it may have an effect opposite to that of reward and as such, discourage the repetition of the act, or, by functioning as a frustrating agent, it may lead to fixation and the other symptoms of frustration as well. It follows that punishment is a dangerous tool, since it often has effects which are entirely the opposite of those desired".

A Reasearcher Catherine Pratt (www.Life-With-Confidence.com)- A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. - Winston Churchill

The emotion you’re feeling is “Frustration”.
With a capital “F”. Maybe even add in some anger because you’ve been working really hard towards your goal or on a project and it just isn’t working. Or you feel like you’re stuck in a dead-end job and can’t find another one. And you may not even really know why.

All you know is that you seem to be stuck and no matter how hard you try, you don’t seem to get anywhere. You’re just spinning your wheels in the mud and all you feel is pure frustration. Sound familiar?

This is the point where a lot of people will just say, “I Quit” and give up. Before you do though, below are 8 ways you can blast through any frustration:

1.  Ask Yourself, “What Is Working in This Situation?” -  Even if feels like nothing is working, look   closely and you will probably find at least something that is going right. So, that’s good. You’ve found something that’s working. Now, how do you improve it? 

By asking this question, you’ve taken yourself out of the negative mindset of “it’s hopeless” and are back to focusing on the positive. There's something that’s working and that will give you a clue of what direction to focus on. You may find that even if your previous issues come up you’ll be able to resolve them in the process of concentrating on your improvements.

2. Keep an Accomplishments Log - Write down everything you accomplish in a log. If you do it in a monthly format you will be able to see all that you have accomplished in just one month. You may be surprised by how much you have done. If you realize there’s not much on the list, it may open your eyes to the fact that you may be procrastinating more than working or that you are using too much of your energy going in too many directions and that you need to focus more. Hopefully, you will have lots of items on your list then you can see that even though it may not feel like it, you are moving forwards. The log will also help to highlight where you were the most effective and where you need to work harder.

3. Focus On What You Want to Happen - Go back to the big picture. What is the desired outcome? Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in one problem and trying to solve it that we forget what we were originally trying to accomplish. Try not to ask yourself, “Why did this happen?” Asking questions like that will keep you rooted in the past. It doesn’t offer a solution to the problem. The important    thing is knowing the answer to the following two questions:
   - What do you want to happen differently this time?”
   - What do you need to do in order to get there?

4. Remove the “Noise” and Simplify - When you’re trying to solve a problem, you can get so wrapped up in trying to find a solution that you add unnecessary clutter, noise, and tasks to a project because you thought they “might” be a solution.

5. Multiple Solutions - You always have options. You just need to brainstorm and figure them out. Tell yourself you need to come up with 8 possible options to what you’re dealing with. Just knowing that you have lots of options will help to make you feel better.  You won’t feel like you are trapped in one negative situation. From your list, figure out the best direction and go for it.

6. Take Action - When you get into serious frustration with a problem, you tend not to want to work on it anymore. It’s hard, it’s  frustrating, and you’re not getting anywhere. So, anything to avoid having to be in that situation may be far more attractive.   

Procrastination may start to set in. If you can keep taking steps forwards, you will probably make it past this temporary hump. As Thomas Edison said, “Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up” and “Surprises and reverses can serve as an incentive for great accomplishment.” The other thing that can happen is that you start to spend a lot of time worrying. Worrying is a definite waste of energy and does not move you in a forwards direction. Only taking action will. Once you start moving forwards again, you will most likely find    that you worried for no reason.

7. Visualize a Positive Outcome to the Situation - A lot of times you can get stuck on focusing on what you don’t want to happen or fearing the absolute worst thing that could happen. The top athletes of the world will imagine themselves competing flawlessly over and over again. There is no room for failure in their minds. This is what you need to focus on as well. See yourself achieving your desired outcome. What will it look like? What will it feel like? What will you say? How will you feel? Take the time to visualize it and really feel it. It will inspire you to keep moving forwards.

8. Stay Positive - Things are usually not as bad as they first appear. Sometimes, things seem much worse simply because we’re tired or mentally drained. Taking a break and remembering to keep your sense of humour can also help. This time of frustration will pass. A positive mind is far more open to solutions and answers than a negative one that thinks it’s just “hopeless” and thinks “what’s the use?” A closed mind will not be able to see the possible solutions when they do come along. Stay positive.

In conclusion, as with any problem, the solution is to figure out what your options are, decide on a plan, focus, and then take action. By using the above 8 steps, you should find that you’re running into fewer problems and feeling less frustration. Instead, you may find that you’re running into opportunities and you know exactly how to take advantage of them.



No comments:

Post a Comment